Can you Sleep Train Newborns?

One of the most commonly asked questions from our clients at Nightingale Night Nurses is “Can you sleep train my newborn?” And the answer is… well, I guess it depends on what your definition of sleep training newborns is! Because what actually is sleep training?

Sleep Training Definition

Experts say:

“Sleep training is the process of training young children to fall asleep on their own, typically by means of techniques in which the child is left to cry without being comforted, either for gradually increasing periods of time or until they fall asleep.”

Oxford Dictionary

“Simply put, sleep training—also called sleep teaching or sleep learning—is the process of helping your infant learn how to fall asleep and stay asleep.”

The Bump

At Nightingales, we feel like the definition of sleep training for newborns is somewhat vague and unclear to new parents. So we have tried to put clear definitions to the terms “Sleep Conditioning” [Aka Sleep Shaping] and “Sleep Training“.

Nightingales’ Sleep Conditioning Definition

Sleep Conditioning is teaching your baby, gently, how to receive the best quality sleep possible. It’s utilizing all of the tools in our disposal to teach your baby healthy sleep habits. This is generally done in a baby’s first 3-4 months. [Sleep conditioning is mostly effective before the 4 month sleep regression.]

Sleep Conditioning Explained:

Let’s dive in. One of our goals at Nightingales is to teach your baby to sleep to the best of their individual ability. If your baby is gaining appropriately, doesn’t have any issues with colic, gas or reflux, and is generally healthy and happy…then our goal is to start working on SLEEP! Yes, right from day one. It’s never too early to start sleep conditioning.

There is no magic wand when it comes to making newborns sleep better. Our whole process leans heavily on a few different things:

1. Slowly stretching nighttime feeds. This means if your baby usually eats at 2am, the next night we might try to hold them off until 2:10am, and the night after that 2:20am. Over time your baby will get used to doing longer and longer stretches in between overnight feedings!
2. Getting your baby on a schedule during the day. If we are only there during the night, then the parents or other caregivers are responsible for this part. We can help you every part of the way. We need to make sure that baby is getting enough to eat during the day, and that they aren’t too overtired to be able to settle to sleep at night. We recommend an eat play sleep schedule if you want to learn more.
3. Teaching your baby to fall asleep independently and fall back to sleep independently! This is a slow process over the first 12-16 weeks. Our favorite way to do this is by utilizing something that Baby Care Classes has coined the “Sleep Steps” to teach baby to fall asleep IN their sleep space.

Sleep Steps:

We could run through these steps in a minute, or work on them for an hour! We understand your baby and their temperament, their hunger cues and what they respond well to.

1. Pause – We don’t rush over to your baby the moment they begin to fuss. We wait it out and watch/listen. If they escalate, we support them. But often babies are only making noises in their sleep or are very capable of getting themselves back to sleep! When we intervene, we often take away their ability to self soothe.
2. Sound – We always recommend sound machines for newborns, but when a baby is starting to fuss, you might want to consider turning up the sound or introducing a shutter.
3. Pacifier – If your baby takes a pacifier, this is the time to offer it to them! We might give them a Paci and hold it in. Or we might pop it in quickly and then hide from them!
4. Third eye or closing eyes – This is when you/we are gently encouraging your baby to close their eyes. This can be with a heavy hand on the eyebrows, covering the eyes or stroking in between the eyes.
5. Gentle hands on reassurance or manipulating sleep space – This means you start to move your baby! Cribs like the SNOO and Cradlewise physically move your baby. Or we as caregivers will put our hands on your baby and offer them some soothing movements…while they are still in the crib! Rock a bye baby in a different format.
6. Firmer hands on reassurance – In this stage you really start moving. SNOO on its highest setting, or wiggling baby. Think of the movement of standing and bouncing your baby to sleep. Or the movement of a stroller on a trail where their head is gently lolling. However, we are doing this when your baby is in their sleep space.
7. Holding – If your baby isn’t responding to soothing in their crib then we will always pick them up and cuddle them.
8. Feeding – If your baby is showing signs that they are hungry and can’t be soothed by other means we will offer them a feeding. Sometimes babies are hungrier than we expect. [Sleep steps are utilized at times when a feeding isn’t due. We would never hold off a baby that we know is hungry!]
9. And Figure out what is wrong – Aside from sleep, the sleep steps are also a way to soothe a fussy baby. Sometimes nothing works and the caregiver needs to figure out if there is a cause to the baby’s distress.

There is a lot more to this! We have videos explaining the sleep steps in depth with videos of the process at Babycareclasses.com!

Our definition of sleep conditioning is that it means being responsive to your baby’s needs and natural rhythms in a developmentally appropriate way with the goal being longer stretches between feedings at night and longer/more consistent naps during the day. Sleep conditioning should be a slow, gradual, gentle process that involves minimal to no crying and is typically utilized for babies 0-16 weeks.

~Nightingale night nurses

Nightingales’ Sleep Training Definition

Okay. So hopefully by now you understand what Nightingales does on overnights with newborns! We offer sleep conditioning. But, what about sleep training newborns? Well..what even is sleep training?

To us, Sleep Training is breaking bad habits, and almost always involves crying. [Whether that crying is supported or not.] We don’t sleep train babies until they are five months old as they are not developmentally ready before that benchmark.

Sleep Training Explained

When parents come to us with older babies/young toddlers and they are overwhelmed, exhausted and looking for solutions, then we talk to them about sleep training. Nobody needs to sleep train their child. Sleep training is only necessary when the parents and/or the babies are not getting the restful, quality sleep that their bodies desire and deserve.

Sleep training is replacing unhealthy sleep habits with better ones. Just like for adults, change for babies is hard. We at Nightingales will talk to you about where your baby is right now, where you want them to be, and how to get them there. There is almost no way to sleep train your baby or toddler without tears. Even the most gentle of methods still involve crying, the difference is just that you are holding them while they yell in your ear!

A sleep training plan should take into account a variety of factors:

• Nutrition:: Are they eating enough total? Are they eating enough during the day? Are they capable of sleeping through the night without a feeding?
• Environment:: Is your baby comfortable in their sleep space? Are they safe? Is their space dark enough?
• Stimulation:: Is your baby getting enough movement and stimulation during their awake times? Or, are they getting too much stimulation/input to process?
• Schedule:: What is their daytime schedule? Is it consistent?
• Variables:: Do you need to bring sister to daycare at a certain time? Is grandma against a certain type of sleep training?

Can The Nightingales Sleep Train My Newborn?

No! Remember? Newborns get the sleep conditioning :]

Can you teach my baby to sleep through the night?

Oh absolutely! 4+ nights a week for 12 weeks and we can typically work some magic!

What about if I’m having overnight care until my baby is 5 months old? Can you sleep train them then?

We can’t sleep train babies on a standard overnight shift. Our overnight team is comprised of Newborn Care Specialists and Postpartum Doulas. It is not within their scope of training to create and implement a sleep training plan. Additionally, “sleep training” is a 24/7 process and isn’t effective without involving naps and an overall plan.

We DO have Sleep Consultants at Nightingale Night Nurses. We can support you virtually, or in your home. Some things to know about our sleep training services:

• We only do “sleep training” for babies over 5 months old.
• We take into account all of the things mentioned above [nutrition, environment, stimulation, schedule ++]
• We work together to create goals for your baby, toddler or child
• We work together to come up with a plan to get there. We don’t offer a one size fits all plans.
• Sleep training is 24/7. You can’t just work on nighttime without working on naps. Everyone caring for the baby has to be on board with being consistent

Our definition of sleep training is to break down unhelpful sleep habits and replace them with beneficial habits and routines. Sleep training results can take anywhere from 72 hours-30 days depending on the plan a parent chooses. All sleep training plans should be developmentally appropriate and take into account the baby’s age, parent’s preferences, overall food/milk intake and other factors also.

Nightingale Night Nurses

Still confused?

It’s okay! Let’s set up a call! Depending on your budget, your baby’s age and development we can almost ALWAYS help parents with sleep in some capacity or another.