Nightingale Nurses Red Thong Story

Parenting Challenges 101: The Red Thong

Posted in

We’ve all had parenting challenges. Might as well blog about/discuss them, right?

The Set-Up

My daughter was about nine months old and walking around by that point. My parents and in-laws were in town one weekend to hang out with the kiddo and we all end up at the mall. During the course of the mall visit, we head into Pacific Swimwear. My daughter is toddling around in there and I’m half-interacting with my parents and half-watching her.

I don’t know many times you’ve been to a Pacific Swimwear in the Boston area. Normally they are fairly legit places, but in this specific situation, well, there’s a lady bending down looking at a shelf. She was chasing specials, you know? And of course, as she’s bending down, this red thong is protruding out. There’s a bunch of guys — some married, some single — in the store looking at her, well, posterior and the red thong. My daughter, who again was not even a full year at this point, goes over behind this woman. She grabs the thong with both hands, yanks it back, and¬†SNAP.

The woman turns around and is like “Uh, hey, excuse me?!?” She then realizes it’s essentially a baby and backs off. Meanwhile all the guys checking out her, well, ass are trying to quickly reframe what they were doing, so they start looking at various sale offerings and humming.

Meanwhile, I run over to my daughter, scoop her up, and I’m like “Sheesh, that was dirty, you need a shower.” She’s smiling. My mom is laughing. This is one of those mortifying moments where you’re like “Oh God, I absolutely cannot believe that happened…” but then, years later, all anyone can do is laugh about it.

Got anything like that in your family?

Leave a Comment