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Oftentimes when parents of a newborn are considering a night nanny, there are a few different major issues they run through in the decision-making process. One is obviously going to be cost (you can learn about our rates here), and one is making sure the night nanny (nannies) are vetted so that you trust the person coming into your home.
One that I hear/get a lot under the radar is: “Does this mean I am a bad mom?”
I understand the rationale for this question. New moms are going through a lot of emotions and changes, and that’s true on your first kid or your fifth kid. Most of societal “norms” are set up around the idea of a mother guiding and protecting a family. There’s also a lot around mom-infant attachment. So, naturally some moms think that if they’re not the one dealing with their baby in the middle of the night, it makes them less of a mom.
So, I understand the idea that a night nanny / baby night nurse might make you feel this way. But in my humble opinion, it’s wrong.
I believe in mother-child attachment, and most of how the Nightingales work actually fosters that. But that’s not the main reason I think this “I’m now a bad mom” attitude is wrong. I think it’s wrong because the real moments you remember as the mom of a newborn are the cute stuff that happens during the day, and the “firsts.” These are often early morning or late afternoon/early evening. They are very infrequently at 3am, although yes, that has happened.
To fully appreciate these moments — times you may be talking about 30-40 years later to this child’s kids — you need to live a healthy, balanced life. The cornerstone of that type of life is sleep. That’s what our night nanny services are rooted in. We handle the overnight care so that you can sleep. The sleep refreshes you, and you’re ready for the moments you will — and this is not hyperbole — cherish forever. When I think of the work we do, I think about it along those lines: we help provide the energy for nourishing and raising your baby. There are lots of little specific things we can all do as a night nanny, but that’s the big picture.
In some ways, then, hiring a night nanny might show you’re a better mom!